A place where I can live, breathe, talk and see

Don't you ever feels that these past few months has been so weird and unexpected? Since November last year I feel like the future is so unpredictable that I wouldn't make any plans even for the next 3 months. Its just too risky.

And its just not fit my liking as newlyweds to unable to plan for anything. I need to plan. I need to collect money, I need to get pregnant, I need to buy a house, I need to buy a car, I need to save to get a proper medical care, and I need to save to be able to give our child the best of environment, food, health care and education.

I can't even take advantage of my free complementary honeymoon stay at Banyan Tree (YET!) and I'm too timid and cautious not to book any cheap promotional airplane tickets for August and beyond.. This whole thing becomes more and more overwhelming to me.

But as for now, I'm just drifting away with the current, and silently pray that I will still have my job tomorrow ..

Come to think of it, it's satirically funny. So now I really realize that the world IS round, and so does wheel.

And how does this affect my so-called "married-life" ?

I do feel changed after getting married. And with all the retrenchments looming around, and pay cut breathing down my neck, I'm most certainly are changed.

I become obsessed with saving, I get irritated easily, and I can no longer be happy with the sight of the stars, or by the vivid greens of leaves. It used to be my secret longing and indulgence.

I'm trying to be back to my old relaxed & grateful & easy-to-please self, and try to see even the thinnest silver lining in the skies.. :)